today is my 1st day of work! You must be excited to find out how is it right? ha. Ok and the ans is .... Its damn freaking boring! Its true, ops is damn boring, esp if u are like me in the documentation team, i don't know what is more boring than that. And yes working in documentation is more boring than staying at home and do nothing.

I felt like sleeping the whole day and I was half-listening to my upp study, half day dreaming. Ok i know i shouldn't judge based on only ONE day, but i highly doubt that my conclusion will be different at the end of 3 mths. Seriously, how FUN can documentation be? The only good thing is perhaps I can get exposure to the different complex derivatives pdts, and really know what is it like in real life.

However I thank God for my colleagues. They are all v nice and a couple of my ntu friends are at the same level as me! And one of them is in my team! Really thank god man, and therefore i dun have to worry about finding people to lunch with me. And i really thank God that I didn't make it thru to MS interview coz its the SAME job and worse, its a perm position! I really want to make use of these 3 mths to do a good job and really think about if i would like to continue.

I'm damn pissed over what someone had said yesterday. Super pissed and upset that i tell myself i must work hard and prove myself in the future. And just about when i decide to perform well, i feel like sleeping when i'm on the job training! HAiz i know what u thinking, i really CMI! ha.

While i was day-dreaming, i reflect upon lots of things. I realise that nobody has any grounds to judge another person, coz u are not even that person, how you know how he/she feels. Like e.g., i keep questioning why people wana be in documentation and in the end i took up the job! ha. However i realise that even though documentation is boring, you can still learn something out of it!

I know that if at the end of 3 mths when i decide to leave after all, some idiots will surely comment about how choosy am i, how inmature am i, and how unrealistic am i, and when am i gonna settle down! True, if i'm another person, i will perhaps think the same way. However do u think i'm dumb? Do u think i didn't consider all the factors, do u think i really think i'm only good enough in the frontline?!! I'm damn furious with people who only know how to criticise others as if you know everything.

I'm v upset, i'm really v upset about how people are belittling others without knowing the facts. You think you are so smart, so wise? *roll my eyes* The fact is you don't know anything. You are not me, so SHUT UP! Only God knows me the best, only he knows what i'm thinking and what i'm going through. I know you will probably mock at me when i say i'm just leaning on God's will and follow the peace. But i'm not going to care about what others think coz i'm not a man-pleaser!

Being a christian in this world is so difficult, coz they don't understand you. However i trust in God that in the end, it will be ok! Anw lets talk about some happy things. Both my head and team leader are good looking angmos! ha.

Today i end work at 7 and i'm the earliest to leave! And when i check out on my friend, he still have 10 letters to draft! TEN! How am i going to survive for the next 3 mths? God pls give me strength!